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YOURS MINE AND OURS

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grandparentBY BIKRAM VOHRA

All these years we have laughed at people who never lose an opportunity to show pictures of their grandchildren. Silly folks. Where do they get off? We have warmly congratulated ourselves on being restrained. When we have them we told each other, we shall refrain from inflicting this imposition on others, it is such a pain to enthuse, why do sensible people do it?

Now, we have three. Grandchildren. And we have them on what’s app, what’s on, what’s doing, what’s what, almost every moment saved for posterity.

We have them crying, eating, sleeping (the little angels) sitting on the potty, saying ‘waaaaaah’ and making other musical sounds, crawling, standing, swimming, we have them on video, on voice recorder and the oldest one’s school play this year was given the sort of treatment that would make Danny Boyle feel challenged.

The other day an A380 pilot friend of ours came over and he watched the youngest grandchild on the iPhone screen hitting a baby piano while she played two feet away from him.

Awesome, he said, she looks just like her pictures, which was an astute observation. He also got a ringside view of my wife’s artistically made cinematic collage of a baby’s bath routine.

Then we showed him the full school play and the oldest one singing, Twinkle, twinkle little star followed by a rendition from the middle lad of ABC all the way to M and he is not yet a year old.

My wife said, but we haven’t shown you the kids in the park, migoodness, it is super, you will love it.

He said, he was sure he would.

So we showed him the grandchildren frolicking in the park and we still had the one where they are playing with a lego set and make a castle that would have pleased Henry VIII and the one ideal for Youtube where they make a 100 piece puzzle which is evidence of their high IQs but he suddenly realised he had to take a flight to Hong Kong and was running late. Tough life these pilots have, they miss out on so many good things. He was really enjoying himself.

Promised that next time around we would show him the grandkids taking swimming lessons but he seems to be very busy because he hasn’t yet taken up the offer to share the splashing video.

Thanks to the mobile phone we can carry scores of pix to parties, to picnics, in waiting rooms and share it with people we know… and do not know.

Thank goodness we hold back and not impose like so many cloying grandparents. The other day I am on a plane and this guy starts showing me his grandchildren’s portfolio. Why do people do that? Why would I want to see your grandkids when I have mine?